


Tangling with Ivy

by Lady_Douji



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Epic (2013)
Genre: Crack Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-22
Updated: 2014-08-22
Packaged: 2018-02-14 07:28:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2183124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Douji/pseuds/Lady_Douji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a bunch of strange things happening in Moonhaven. A Stomper leaving strange plants everywhere, and what's with that giant Boggan?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tangling with Ivy

Nod flew his bird low around the tree branches, grateful Captain Birch had ordered him to scout ahead. A few more minutes with the group and Nod would have slugged someone, and he didn’t really want to do that. He didn’t know what was wrong, but everything had felt off for the past couple days, leaving him irritated and snapping at everyone. Birch finally told him to do his job and cool his head. Although, right then not even flying was making him feel better. A flash of red up ahead caught his eye. 

Perching his hummingbird Nod eyed a bush unlike any he had seen before. It was still small as bushes went, perhaps only a foot tall with strange red flowers, fused petals forming a goblet shape with five stamens reaching up like a sinister claw. Nod gave the call of a waxwing to let his squad know he had found something. 

Drumming his fingers against his saddle Nod debated about waiting for his group. Regulations said that he should but he was still feeling irritated and didn’t want to deal with anyone. Plus that odd feeling had grown and he suspected the plant might be involved. Making his decision, Nod quickly dismounted. 

“You stay here boy.” Nod said, giving the bird a quick pat.

It took only a few long jumps to make it to the strange bush. Climbing up to examine the flowers, Nod wondered where the plant had come from. It didn’t look like any local species and was far too big to have grown from a wind blown seed. At dinner the night before, Ronin had talked about reports concerning a strange Stomper woman who had been leaving strange plants throughout the forest, maybe this was one of hers. If it was, it still didn’t explain what it was, or why being close to it was making his hair stand on end.

As he reached the odd red flower Nod was starting to think this wasn’t the best of his ideas. Up close the scent of the flower was making his head grow fuzzy. As his vision started to dim he could see the rest of his squad landing on the same branch he had left his bird. It was getting harder to stay upright, and Nod was really regretting deciding to investigate on his own. Hearing shouting from his squad, Nod shook his head struggling to clear it. Giving three sharp whistles to warn the others to stay back, he finally lost his footing and fell into the flower. 

Laying at the bottom of the flower, Nod’s last thought before passing out was “Ronin’s gonna be so mad.”

 

Captain Birch bit back a curse as he watched Nod fall into the flower. “Great, just great.”

“Sir,” James, his second lieutenant asked, “What is that thing?

“I have no idea, James,” Birch answered, “The real question is how are we going to get Nod out of it. ”

“Maybe if we hover with our birds high enough we could use a rope and kinda fish Nod out?” Garran suggested.

“Maybe. . .” Birch was interrupted by the crashing sounds of a Stomper approaching. “Everyone take cover and stay hidden.”

The remaining members of the squad quickly scattered as the stomper came into view. Birch frowned at as the stomper came into view. He had seen a few stompers on his patrols, but never one like this. Dressed all in black, with a cape and a cowl the Stomper looked like a giant Boggan.

The Stomper knelt beside the strange plant that had trapped Nod, pulling out a mask to cover his nose and mouth. He examined the plant for a minutes before pulling a few more tools from his belt. Birch’s eyes widened as he watched the Stomper take a cutting from the bush, including the flower Nod had fallen into.

“Oh, this just CANNOT be happening.” Birch growled out, as the stomper set the cutting into a case before moving off again. “Everyone! Follow that Stomper! Watch for any opportunity to grab Nod.”

The squad lifted off, flitting through the trees as they followed the giant Boggan. Keeping up wasn’t a problem, however the strange Stomper kept the case he unknowingly placed Nod into close. They reached the edge of the forest and Birch felt a flash of panic when he saw the Stomper heading toward a wheeled Stomper machine. He had seen Stomper machines like this. Stompers used them to make up for being so slow, and they went very fast, faster than how most birds could fly. Birch didn’t know how Stompers managed them without crashing. 

His panic only grew when the Stomper opened the doors to the machine, placing the case inside.

“Oh, nonono.” Birch hissed, “If the Stomper leaves in that thing we’ll never be able to track him.”

“Sir!” Lucas, one of the scouts shouted, pulling up to his flank. “I think I can hitch a ride in that thing. Find out where he goes then fly back to Moonhaven.”

“That’s a big risk, Lucas.” Birch objected, torn between agreeing to the plan and risk losing two of his scouts, or having to report Ronin he had lost Nod to a giant Boggan.

“I know Sir, but we have to do something.” Lucas replied urgently.

“Alright, go for it.” Birch ordered. “Be careful and report back as quickly as possible. The rest of us will distract that Stomper so you can sneak inside that thing.”

“Yes, Sir!” Lucas pulled away to watch for an opportunity to sneak inside the Stomper’s machine.

Birch signaled to the rest of the squad to perform diving runs at the giant Boggan. As they swooped close to the giant Boggan’s head and he turned to face them, Lucas darted behind his back into the machine. Birch couldn’t see where Lucas hid himself, and could only hope he found a safe spot. Whistling to the others to fall back, they retreated to the trees. The giant Boggan stared suspiciously into the forest, holding a dangerously sharp looking item in his hand. After a moment he turned away and got into the wheeled machine, the machine roared to life taking the giant Boggan, Nod, and Lucas speeding away.

Watching them disappear with a sigh Birch order, “Alright everyone. Back to Moonhaven. We need to report this to Ronin.”

 

 

 

Batman sat hunched over his lab table, the cutting he took from the strange plant he found carefully placed in a sealed case. So far the standard tests showed the plant had only sedative effects which was unusually mild for Poison Ivy. Hearing the elevator door open, signaling Alfred entering the Batcave, Batman leaned back and stretched a moment .

“Good afternoon Master Bruce,” Alfred said fondly carrying a tray with sandwiches and juice. “How goes the search for Dr. Isley.”

“I’ve narrowed her location to a small forest in the southeast corner of Pennsylvania. Apparently she objects to some developers who want to turn it into a suburb.”

“Well I can’t say I disagree.” Alfred said dryly, “I would think we have quite enough suburbs filled with empty homes to bother making more.”

“It is beautiful country.” Batman noted, “but I can’t allow Ivy to murder people to keep it safe. Although her plants seem a lot tamer than usual.”

“How so, Sir?”

Typing a few commands to begin another scan, “So far none of her plants have been deadly.” Batman responded, gesturing to the cutting in the case. “This one only puts people to sleep.”

“That is uncommonly gentle of Doctor Isley.” Alfred agreed, “Perhaps her time in Arkham is slowly paying off.”

Batman snorted, “Not likely.” The computer dinged as it finished the scan and displayed the results. “That’s odd, one of the flowers is showing a heat signature. But only the one.”

Reaching into the sealed case via the built in gloves Batman carefully separated the ominous flower from the rest. Tilting the flower to examine it, Batman raised an eyebrow at a flash of green inside. Tipping the flower, Batman’s eyes did widen as a small green figure tumbles into his hand.

Batman gently held the tiny figure, bringing him under a magnifying glass to see the details of the armor. “Remarkable.”

Alfred looked over Batman’s shoulder at the tiny green clad man in Batman’s hand. “Is Dr Isley creating Lilliputians? Is he alright?”

Batman pulled one hand out and open the case, juggling the small man to look over him more closely. Carefully pulling off the man’s helmet, Batman wondered if he should call in the Atom. Dr. Choi might not be a medical doctor but he could at least be on the same scale as the tiny man. 

“Hmm, creating human looking beings it’s Ivy style, but then neither are these other plants she’s created. For now it looks like he’s just asleep because of the plant.” Batman finally concluded. “Can you bring me what’s in cabinet A-5289 please?”

“Of course, Sir.” Alfred said moving off to the cabinets

Continuing the remove the man’s weapons and armor, Batman couldn’t help but marvel at the detail on the items. Hearing Alfred’s footsteps he looked up from his work observing Alfred’s tiny frown.

“Sir? Should I be concerned that you have a doll sized prison cell among your collection of crimefighting tools?”

“The Atom requested miniature sized cells in case of enemies getting stuck in a shrunken size.” Batman explained, “I kept one of the prototypes. It’s fully functional and secure.”

Alfred set the cage onto the table. “And you intend to place our tiny guest into it.” His tone both disappointed and disapproving.

“Until I know whether he’s a creation of Ivy’s or not I need to keep him secure.” Batman reasoned as he opened the cell and carefully placed the man onto the cot inside the cell, before sealing it. “Besides it would be too easy for him to get lost here if he was loose.”

“As you say, Sir.” Alfred replied, unconvinced by Batman’s reasoning, “I believe I will go prepare lunch.”

With that Alfred turned around and head back up to the manor. Batman set a camera to monitor the tiny man in the cell before turning back to the plant. He still needed to make a counter- agent for it.

**Author's Note:**

> This Isabeau25's fault. We were chatting she meant to type Batman and Robin, but accidentally typed Batman and Ronin. I chortled right up until a plot bunny bit me and now I have this lovely piece of crack to share with everyone. I got her back though. I sicced a plot bunny on her and it's gonna be so awesome when she finally writes it.


End file.
